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Conan’s thoughts on love

Please share me:
Welcome back to my column – despite early misgivings, I’m quite enjoying doing this.  I mean, I just lie here on my cushion, dictate my thoughts and Sam writes them down – easiest job in the world for me and a good use of her … am not sure what else she actually does, quite frankly.

We had a lovely donation of a small sofa this week – although I notice it’s gone into the other garden pen instead of mine.  I’d quite like to have a sofa and I would share it – well, possibly.
So today, of course, is St Valentine’s Day so I thought I’d share my thoughts on love.  I’m no stranger to affairs of the heart, naturally – looking like I do is every female’s dream so obviously I’ve had my fair share of moments in my youth, fathered more kittens than I should but that’s the younger generation for you.  Not sure that love actually came into it if I’m honest but what can I say?  I was just sowing oats.  Good thing child support isn’t a thing for felines or I would be completely broke.  So, any of you who have not sterilised your furry family members, do it now!  You know it makes sense – mainly as the world could not cope with more Conan clones.
These days, along with my advancing years, I prefer companionship and I’m lucky to have plenty of females to share my cushion – Blondie and Ella in particular.  Who do you have to share your cushion today?  Whoever it is, give them lots of food.  They will appreciate it.  Burp.
Therefore, in honour of the day, I’ve been feeling a bit poetic so here goes :
Roses are red
I like you a bit
Get off my cushion
That’s where I sit
Tune in next time – love and paws, Conan x

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Sam Weller

Middle aged mad cat woman - slave of 4 rescue babies

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